Here's a quick list that I offer and don't.

Services I offer

My Dos'

Web Design
Logo Design
Hand Drawn Vector Illustrations
Online Business Strategy
Print Ad Design
Media Buying
Domain Registration
Hosting (must be logged to see this)
CMS Setup
Database Backup/Restore
Email Administration
Logo Re-design
Template Modification (WordPress & Joomla)
3D Rendering
Content Layout
SEO Optimization
Photo Optimization
Photo Retouching
Basic Audio Production
Light Video Editing
Responsive Design for Mobile Devices
Portrait Photography
Event Photography
Pet Photography
Wedding Photography
Corporate Identification
Brand Consulting
Advertising Campaign Creation

Services I Don't Offer

Maybe in another lifetime

Jello Wrestling
PC Repair
How to use MS word
Dog Walking
Commercial Airline Piloting
Water Landings
Moon Landings
Crime Fighting
Lion Taming
Alligator Wrestling
Stealing Picnic Baskets
Paralegal Training
Knife Juggling
Sword Swallowing
Underwater Demolition
Frying Bacon In the Nude
Singing Telegrams
Regular Telegrams
Molecular Research
Quantum Physics
Natural Male Enhancement
Interpretive Dance (Seasonal)
Laser Hair Removal
Cosmetic Surgery
Shark Hunting
Whale Hunting
Sky Diving
How to train your dragon